[The mutual implication of seeking pardon and repentance] becomes clearer when one mentions sincere repentance and its reality. The Almighty said, “O believers! Turn unto Allah in sincere repentance! It may be that your Lord will remit from you your evil deeds and bring you into Gardens of flowing rivers underneath…” [66:8]
Hence, He made the protection from the evil of bad deeds, which is their expiation, by removing what the servant hates, and entering him into the Gardens, which is the attainment of what the servant loves, contingent upon the attainment of sincere repentance. The word naṣūḥ is on the pattern faʿūl, a form of fāʿil [subject] intended for exaggeration, like shakūr [exceptionally grateful] and ṣabūr [exceptionally patient]. The root is n-ṣ-ḥ, which is to remove a thing from deception and foreign impurities, and it meets in its larger derivation with nuṣḥ when it is pure; nuṣḥ in repentance, worship, and consultation all mean removing them from any deception, deficiency, and corruption, and performing them in the most perfect fashion. Nuṣḥ is the opposite of deception.
The expressions of the Predecessors have differed on this even as they go back to the same meaning. ʿUmar b. al-Khaṭṭāb and Ubayy b. Kaʿb, Allah be pleased with them both, said, “Sincere repentance is that one repents from the sin and then never returns to it, just like the milk does not return to the udder.” Al-Ḥasan of Basra said, “It is that the servant become regretful over what has passed, resolved to never return to it.” Al-Kalbī said, “That he seek pardon by the tongue, feel regret by the heart, and hold his limbs from it.” Saʿīd b. al-Musayyib said, “Sincere repentance is that by which you are sincere to yourself”; he thus gave it the meaning of sincere advisor to the repentant person, making the object into the subject. The first opinion gives it the meaning of the object, that is, the repentance in which the repentant is sincere and did not mix it with deceit, thus it is either in the meaning of “that which was accomplished with sincerity,” as we use rakūba or ḥalūba in the meaning of markūba and maḥlūba. Alternatively, it could be given the meaning of the subject, that is, [the repentance] that is sincere, pure, and truthful [to the person who does it].
Muḥammad b. Kaʿb al-Quraẓī, Allah have mercy on him, said, “Four things hold it together: seeking pardon by the tongue, renouncing it by the body, inner commitment to never return to the crime, and abjuring evil company.”
I say that sincerity in repentance comprises three things.
First, inclusion and encompassing of all sins in it, such that no sin is left out of its scope.
Second, confluence of all the resolve and truthfulness in it, such that there remains not the slightest hesitation, blaming [of someone else] or wait [to see what happens]; rather, he embraces it with all of his resolve and determination.
Third, its purity from impurities and defects that compromise it, its occurrence for the fear and trepidation of Allah Almighty alone, desire for what He has and fear of what He has, not like someone who repents to protect his influence, honour, status, power, or to protect his spiritual state, or his strength and wealth, or seeking people’s praise or avoiding their blame, or so that fools may not overpower him, or to end his addiction to sin, or fearing poverty and helplessness, and other such defects that compromise its soundness and sincerity for Allah.
The first pertains to what one repents from, the third to Him to whom he repents, and the middle one pertains to the person and ego of the repentant one. Sincerity of repentance is truthfulness in it, purity, and all-inclusiveness, and doubtless such repentance requires and includes seeking pardon, and erases all sins. It is the most perfect kind of repentance. Allah alone is sought for help and reliance, there is no power to change or resist except through Allah.
Ibn Qayyim al-Jawziyyah, Madarij al-Salikin Ranks of the Divine Seekers Vol 1 p654-656
honey for the heart 